So how can you protect yourself—really?
1. Wait to have sex.
No, this is not the abstinence until marriage suggestion. I’m advocating that you consider waiting a bit (probably longer than you feel like waiting) before you have sex with someone you are dating. Rather than relying on the “five-date rule,” “one-month rule” or whatever it is, try and prolong the sexy stu? until you really feel like you know and trust the other person. Remember the advice from The Millionaire Matchmaker, Patti Stanger: no sex before monogamy!
Ladies, men will wait if they really like you. I have surveyed several of my attractive, straight male friends who all say that they are willing to wait months—not just a few dates or a few weeks—to have sex with a woman they really care about. The women I know who have waited around three months to have sex with their partners have wonderful things to say about how strong their relationships turned out. I’m not putting down women who have sex early on in a relationship; I’m merely pointing out that sex early on can cloud your perception of a man’s character. We’ve all gotten light in the head and downright dickmatized by guys who were more like pricks in disguise than the princes of our dreams.
2. Discuss your sexual histories and habits.
No matter what, do not tell your guy “your number” or try to guess at his. Discussing the gory details of how many people you have each been with will only cause drama and awkwardness, and at least one of you will be lying anyway. Instead, talk about what kinds of contraceptive measures you’re accustomed to and make sure that both of you agree on using sexual protection. Women should be particularly wary of men who consistently put them in the position of having to be the protection police. If a guy is willing to have sex with you without a condom, he’s probably done the same thing with lots of other women.
3. Discuss your sexual health and status early on.
If you make it clear from the beginning that your sexual health is very important to you, the guy has plenty of time to get tested and show you the results before any hanky-panky goes down. He has no excuses not to get tested if you give him plenty of time. Make it clear that this is a prerequisite to getting access to your Little Miss Pretty.